Monday, February 14, 2011

Women and Positive Deviance, “Nos Sobran Motivos”

By Jorge Luis Aguilar Cruz




Positive Deviance in any setting is sometimes very subtle, and not as apparent, but it can also be seen across the world, as many case studies and stories told by our professor have shown.  I am huge fan of subtle, encouraging, and inspiring Positive Deviance.  The way I have done this is by providing you with a personal example of a case and the great people I worked with and what we accomplished, but first being that it is the day of love, I have no greater love than for women, especially the one who gave birth to me, my sister, mi Tia’s and primas, my grandmother and great grandmother, and a many young ladies I have met along the way.
            
The young ladies I speak of are at a local alternative high school, this high school is for young ladies who are pregnant, have recently become pregnant, or had recently given birth. We had the amazing privilege to work on campus with these wonderful young ladies. Our position on campus was one of let us say, a mentors and university outreach. My goal was to mentor them and try to get them to go to college, but we focused more on trying to fix their relationships and being available to them emotionally.  SOME of these young ladies had a lot of problems at home, with the father of their child, issues with teachers and counselors. After some time there, I too felt that energy, SOME teachers felt sorry for girls, basing their harsh judgments on race and income levels, and they treated them indifferently even in the classroom.

The center in which I worked at along with some amazing ladies who cared for the young ladies and their children did some amazing work, at the time we did not think about it, some of the things we did could have gotten us fired, and truth be told, I did get fired after my 6month stint there.  It was positive deviance, compassion, and love all in oneWe provided emotional support in conversations about their relationships with their parents, and boyfriends, and since I was the only man working in the whole facility, and the girls knew I was raised by a single mother, the girls felt very compelled to come to me. Hugs, and other exchanges of affection and “buenos dias, y Gracias,” and serenades on Mother’s Day and birthdays (on my behalf) were always and often used. We helped them financially by buying them baby formula, giving them rides home, buying them baby clothes and school supplies (all things we were not supposed to do.)  I provided them with additional outside academic resources, we tutored the girls in math, speech and taught them how to use the computers to help them in the classroom.  We also implemented discipline, I was known for my positive comments to the girls, “punctuality not apologies, andele apurese apurese.” Discipline in the form of careful consideration to change some of their manners in cursing, referring to one another, etc.

We went outside our job duty, that is safe to say, but we did what was right, since no one wanted to help, we did.  Women in my opinion are the supreme being, and they should be treated with care and respect, especially when they are young and impressionable, like the young ladies we had the privilege to work with. We instilled in them values and appreciation in them for things they perhaps had never considered, all we settled for was a Thank You, a hug and a hope that they would pay it forward. “Nos sobran motivos,” one young lady said to us, she said “you are left with many motives; why not try to help people, instead of beating them to the ground.” This student had C’s and D’s in class, by the time we were done surrounding her with compassionately positive deviantly love, she graduated with honors, changed her life around, and enrolled at EPCC Valle Verde.

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